Now more than ever, there is so critical a need to develop our Self-Awareness and authenticity. And the first step in developing Self-Awareness is to be aware of our self-talk, particularly our negative self-talk. Authenticity comes into play in how much you adapt while being your authentic self.
My podcast guest, Alan Miller, in episode #32 of the Self-Care Goddess podcast, is the founder of Innermetrix, a UK-based company that has developed various tools to identify what drives performance by highlighting an individual or teams’ natural talent. These tools generate a profile of behavior, values (motivation), and engagement to help leaders obtain the best possible outcome and develop high levels of self-awareness and authenticity. Here are snippets of some of our conversation, for the full conversation listen to the podcast directly here.
What Are Values?
Gordon Allport and Eduard Spranger invented personal values. Values can change throughout our life and at different stages our values can be different. If we analyze individual people within a business and draw a value profile from the collective what you will find it that you can generally boil down to 7 values. Values don’t generally change unless there is an extreme emotional event such as marriage, divorce, or business bankruptcy, our value structure is affected and we change intrinsically. Allan argues that understanding the company’s collective values is the best way to do cultural change within companies. If you value your staff and people in your organization, you get twice back. How you value people tends to be challenging for some leaders and managers because they do the same for everybody. When we understand that people can be different and appreciate other people’s profile; we are able to manage and communicate differently with each individual and get the best results. As a company if you understand what motivates and drives people, you can then manage them.
Good organizations recognize the different personalities, communication styles and reward accordingly. A lot of people after a performance management appraisal in the workplace, come out feeling suck at their job because their value structure isn’t connected to their KPIs (key performance indicators). The way we can make them feel understood is change some of the KPIs to align their top two values. Aligning KPIs with their values creates a truly personalized performance appraisal experience.
If you need guidance on how to set up a workplace wellness strategy, book your complimentary Workplace Wellness call with me here.
What is Self-awareness & Authenticity?
With the help of Dr. Robert S. Hartman’s value theory and foundation we can measure how we think and make decisions. The matrix that was developed after studying behavior for 25 years, identified two major traits which define successful people:
The first step in Self-Awareness is to know that we have a negative self-talk. We can measure self-awareness in three different ways:
- Sense of Self -This is our self-belief, self-worth and self-esteem that we have in our mind.
- Self-Direction – This is where we aim to go in the next six months or one year.
- Role Awareness -This is a clear vision in our life that defines our role on the personal and professional front. If these roles are not clear, we can’t move forward because we would be unable to understand what we are doing.
The platinum rule to find out how people want to be treated, is appreciating that their profile is different from yours, and then treating them to the best of your ability while staying within your authentic self. For authenticity, we have to know our values and stick to them.
Do you want to know “How to Focus on What You Want to Happen Using NLP?” Listen to Self-Care Goddess Podcast episode #21 here.
How To Achieve OUR Goals?
Did you know that 90% of new year resolutions fail by February? This is because when goals are difficult and challenging, people go off track.
We all have a mission for ourself which are goals or objectives we want to achieve in the next six months. We write down these SMART goals but to be authentic Allan recommends to have accountability for yourself and also be accountable to someone else to ensure you are on track.
Rather than having 50 goals that are vague and without self-direction, look at something tangible and make yourself accountable in order to move forward. Pick just one goal but that one goal should be so brilliant and clear that we can see it, touch it, feel it, smell it, and go towards it. Take personal responsibility and focus on what we want to achieve.
In the beginning of the year, I don’t like to set goals, but instead set intentions by asking yourself the question – Who do I want to be by the end of the year?
For more information watch my workplace wellness training video ‘5 Ways To Maximize Your Team’s Potential’ on my YouTube channel here.
Why Do We Behave The Way We Do?
Innermetrix measure behavior on a natural basis and an adaptive basis. Allan explains that there are only two things that affect adaptive behavior results.
- People in that environment.
We always have a choice of what happens in our world externally and the people in our world see our best or worst self. When we hear someone blaming someone else for their feelings, we educate them on the behaviors because we always have a choice in how we behave.
If in a job you are adapting 60%-65% beyond your natural style, you may be in the wrong job. This is why so many people in the world are stressed in their jobs. Align your job to your values and behavior or at least to a lower level of adaptation because we may never get a job that suits perfectly, but we can get a job where we have to adapt only about 20%-40% and for the rest of the day, we can be our natural self.
Stress is one of the biggest killers in workplaces. Everybody gets stressed, but we must learn how to manage stress. Majority of employees who have been mismanaged, ultimately leave because they’re changing the situation by being self-aware and making the right decision for themselves. For an interesting tip to avoid stress watch my YouTube video here.
How Can Breathwork Help In Decision Making?
Every human being thinks three dimensionally, about any decision they make. We call it subconscious thinking, and conscious thinking. 90% of the day, everybody makes subconscious decisions. The human brain consciously can only think about seven things. Subconsciously we can think of millions of things at the one time. When we breathe in oxygen, our brain gets this oxygen and it makes us feel and think.
Here’s an interesting practice that Allan witnessed in an organization at Japan. All the employees get a martial art mat and sit cross legged as karate businessmen. In the middle of the room, they put up a problem on the floor. It’s a real problem in the company. They do a breathing exercise for 20 minutes. As they breathe in for 25 seconds and breathe out for 25 seconds they think of the problem and generate initial ideas how to solve it. Now that’s pretty cool way of bringing in breathwork to the workplace for creative problem solving.
For amazing breathwork information listen to podcast episode #30 ‘Conscious Breathing Your First Pillar of Self-Care’.
When it comes to decision making we can sometimes have a potential blind spot. We may make a snap decision that may be the wrong one. I am self-aware that I sometimes make the wrong decision very quickly and this affects other people and me. The good news is when we understand that potential blind spot, we get our conscious brain active to avoid that blind spot when making decisions. When we understand who we are, appreciate people’s profile, and know the six pillars that can help in decision making we can make a difference to everybody who interacts with us personally and professionally. For more information read my blog post on the Savoia Self-Care Method.
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